Monday, December 1, 2025

Coin locker kid - The Salmon of Doubt (Main Issue)

1 favorite - Review in the list "Series" under "Coin locker kid reviews" - Alternate issue review

(Low quality photo of a drawing I did listening to Alandaluz as of April 2026, which I will now use as a "cover" of sorts for this review. I promise I want a scanner so bad: ILL PUT THIS BACK SOON SORRY) (If you're reading this please remind me to update this, it's an embarrassingly bad photo but I would've forgotten to add it otherwise...)

Trading with the fishes has never been so easy.

Before, you needed to put on this 2-ton motor suit, and you needed a translator or surgery to be able to emit similar sounds as the fishes, but now...! They've found the fish are fond of music, so you just put on your favorite Blogspot Ambient and it soothes them right away... some have cassette players, so you might wanna dig around your dixie dream houses for your rare 2017 and Cyan Sun beauties. It really depends on every fish too, some of them also like "Deaf tones" or whatever their stupid name is (how I wish they were...!), Agalloch, Cadnep, really all forms of all kinds of all all all all... all encompassing in the endless universe. Do you think they have rym too? Let me know in five years. Five year update: (pending 2031)

Recently, a fish approached me with Tenemgras O Baum, a crazy music concrete experiment from the undulant and ermbiousent "J of the B.A.llardns" [not sic, for the real name involves hundreds of -phonicasso style paper clippings in the form of 20th century link rot. Wriggling, wriggling, wriggling.

Tapid angeless decadent silkless web. How long i've been holding funerals for the could and the "'s beens." I remember the people who were only ever such as historical archive in unprotected PDFs of the web highways of every government... I remember the first time I met one in the summer of 2019 inbetween arid love and miasma, not yet terribly bound by nostalgia, free-roaming, "ghost/spirit" still not a point nor timespan in concept. I learnt so much of Michigan life, oh how I wish to touch down someday and feel the snow enclose me...

It's funny, you must've fed me the idea of angels. I remember prancing the woods for a night of fear and inbound libertarianaux conquest, talking to you through the web. Pharloom must've been known around that time, but who knows anything these days.

Persecuted by the ultraviolet rays... you told me your mother and father had separated quite recently, that you didn't feel too bad about it but I could tell you still wanted them to be in good terms. You weren't the type for holidays, given you were talking during New Years, so I imagine two anxious knife-cuttable tensions split across two parties would be unpleasant. You didn't seem to be home anyway, I didn't know much yet.

Your cat had gone missing, I remember now, that's why you left the house. Your uncle would die come next January too, but I'm getting ahead now. We were talking about Kaklin Gateway, it was a forum inspired by Jain, in where Kaklin is the last interim entralliand state before death, so the gateway was this beyond. "It kinda sounds like, uh, you ever play E.Y.E. ...?"

...you said no. I suggested to buy it for you but you rejected incessantly. I forgot how we got to this point, but you got all quiet and timid and you described it all so clearly finally;

You swam through the creek. Becoming one again and again. Gateway open. Gateway entered.

Adios, salmon.

Te vere en el futuro.] and I offered in exchange a Traumnovelle cassette I had bought recently, but, no luck.

Goodbye, dumb fish...

Coin locker kid - Hailstorm & Maelstrom (Main Issue)

5 favorites - Review in the list "Series" under "Coin locker kid reviews" - Owned in CD - Cyan Sun Records issue

"Hailstorm & Maelstrom
Coin locker kid
Quote unquotes and hyperlinks. Made me less of a man"

i was writing a pretty long review about how i started as a cis straight boy and turned out the way i did, but i dont think it matters much. this is a scary album and one thats helped me reconcile with who i was and who i am currently. i think youd be hardpressed to find better and more heartbreaking queer writing in other music.

as i said what mustve been like five years ago now, this album made me less of a man. thank you.

Saturday, July 26, 2025

Coin locker kid - Empathica

1 favorite - Review in the list "Series" under "Coin locker kid reviews"

Leviathan's first appearance, mentions of Finnegans Wake, soldiers stringing on about the multicolored highway known colloquially as death and rebirth, the universe has come to feed us all in a vat of acid in -phonics form by the majestic Coin locker kid. Sounds like field recordings of a rainbow jungle with toys clattering about as their batteries start to warp from the hot sun blaring down. Little robots (the ones with open mouths but clenched teeth) playing their itty-bitty drums, spiders with synths. A series of largely irrelevant to describe acronym-bearers singing and living through difficult shared experiences seem to completely overshadow the already profoundly dense production, much to its benefit. Other beautiful words to get you to listen to this, unsure. Worth your time.

If your death finds itself out-of-sync with the general world clock, then it's worth listening or even revisiting albums like these and letting the lyrics wash over you akin to philosophical theory.

First listened on a bootleg CD in the van of a girl who was very dear and near to my heart for a long while, she gave me my first blunt and bong and etc etc et-such, it was about 10 in the morning, blue bloom intertwining the whatevers, I was playing Gothic for the first time, not that I was very good or I cared much, but she cared and wanted me to care too. Thanks dear!! Glass splinters reminds me most of it.

Coin locker kid - Discordia

0 favorites

I was a bit mean about this album in the past. It's not that bad! 2012-2016 offshoots from Coin locker kid work pretty well when treated not as a cohesive album but a collection of human wires. Highlights include "Echo of the eye." and a better-than-the-original cover of "Fourteen".

Your Kid A - Amnesiac was Empathica and Manic Pixie Dream World, though.

"Buy this tape, if you can find it. Buy the download if you can't. This far exceeds any comparison to other tapes in the genre. In fact, it supersedes genres. It's pop/ musical/ electronica. Coin Locker Kid is the most vibrant new artist I've heard-on any format-in years. This is the "Sgt. Pepper's" of the tape world. That by which all others will now be measured. Simply stunning."

Coin locker kid - Traumnovelle

1 favorite - Review in the list "Series" under "Coin locker kid reviews"

Dated and beautiful. Stillborn cake amalgams. In many ways an escape from the blogsphere, it makes sense he needed a couple years to charge back up after this one.

(Have you ever read Finnegans Wake? You might have to... "Cornelius LocKwood wrote a book once. from what i gather from clk's sparse interviews, he also hasnt read it, he just looked at the wikipedia page like i did. really grounds this stuff to earth like cables in circuitry when you learn that.")

Wednesday, July 9, 2025

Devon Hendryx - The Ghost~Pop Tape (Main Issue)

2 favorites - Alternate issue review

if you think this is cloud rap you should kill yourself

july 9th:
this review is kinda nothing, a bit too much string of thought because im sad and i dont have anywhere to really put this on or anything like that. this is empty stuff, im replicating other reviews i enjoy and their expressions and their formatting or whatever but i cant do it as good, i havent lived that much life, i havent been that much person. its kinda what i make music about, im not really human in that way. not to say im a goat or whatever, i just think im missing some core understanding of emotions and shit. idk maybe thats autism but nobody describes it like that. also i had a lot more thoughts on certain rambling but i felt like it was too much nothingness so i cut it off

in january and the tail start of february of this year i was in a fling with this person (who shall go unnamed for all of eternity until every sun in every system dies or fizzles out or stops giving light or whatever happens to them) and i talked to them a lot about music and whatnot. we have very different tastes (namely, it loves My Living Tombstone which is something i could never find myself liking) in music but it still let me introduce it to this album, my favorite one ever. i dont think it really cared that much, but something about that time still stuck with me. every time i hear this album it feels like its done just as it started, and i always gain something new out of it. this time what i got back is that this is an awful album to show to someone youre trying to love.

the relationship fizzled out because i wasnt ready to love someone at that time ((i am aromantic, shocker!)) and it always felt a bit weird to talk to it afterwards. i remember i kinda had this massive hole after it stopped talking to me, but whatever.

a few weeks later, february 13th, i was playing eye divine cybermancy (awesome goated game) with a friend whilst this person was looking, and i get a call from a family member i havent talked to in a while. she tells me that my uncle has cancer and that shes trying to get in contact with that side of the family so they can sort anything out, so i give her the number of someone and try to forget about it as i play more. bummer, shocker, whatever you will. i was trying to have fun, i was trying to spend the day with a friend, not think about even more cancer in the family.

the next day, i listened to Call Me Maybe all day and i heard J Dilla's Donuts somewhere in there too. my uncle was dead. i didnt call anyone, and i told my dad but he didnt really care. i woke up that day to maybe ten? fifteen? messages from the person i couldnt date asking me about a very wrong thing i did but i think i got out of it kind of easily. i guess. id like to go more into detail about that but its still a thing im doing so i cant really. it sucks, and im a bad and terrible person.

the next paragraph is one of these two because im an awful writer and didnt know where to place these events

1. theres this reviewer called spiritof77 (mike) who tragically died about a decade and change ago. my friend introduced me to his reviews and showed me his review of j dilla's circles. that review is kind of a much better version of this one, it has better expressions and thoughts and stories and whatnot. theres a lot to love in that album but maybe even more to love in that review. its part journal, part look into a dead person.

as i write this im listening to a song by that friend (sorry buddy), its some indistinguishable singing over guitar and drums that itch my brain the right way. i dont know. theres something very sweet about the song and his singing. its weird to think that im one of few people in the world who knows about that song, who knows about his music, whatever. the rest of his music isnt all that great in comparison, but this specific song is pretty nice.

2. in june, i showed the album to a friend whilst we were waiting for pe class. we were outside, swinging, and i played a couple songs for him (liara, ballad of a poor man, neon kitchen, and call me maybe, in that order) as well as some songs by other artists. he said he liked it, i dont really know if he did or what he thought but thats what he told me. im happy with that! i really am. i enjoy seeing people tell me they like things. but i still kinda had this pit from the last time i showed someone the album in full.

i still have the date memorized and i took a screenshot of the page on my lastfm from when i listened with it, 8-9am of february 7th. it was nice outside, blue and stuff. i remember defending myself and the album's copious porn samples by justifying it under the pretense of artistic expression, showing his crippling porn addiction or whatever. i dont disagree with it, but idk, i guess i just felt pretty attacked getting told that this was a "freaky" album. (i hate that word. i really do. we abandoned so many better words for "freaky" and "goon". what happened?)


i kinda lost track of my timeline, but idk. somewhere in may or april or whatever i was relistening to call me maybe again (i was writing a proper denser review of the album and the song, which you can see a bit of here Call Me Maybe (多分)), and something really clicked about the song that time. i was a couple days in to writing the review, and had been looking at wwe wikipedia pages for longer than id like to admit (keep in mind none of these people are popular here so i needed a bit more background than most), and as i was watching a hell in a cell match with the undertaker vs shawn michaels (sampled in call me maybe), i kinda had an epiphany. i dont remember it exactly, it wasnt words i could put into paper or click onto the rym box oir my website or whatever, but it changed my outlook on life. it felt more positive. what i did write down was that, that fight conveyed devon's fight perfectly, with him being the underdog of the fight and eventually winning, but i think it doesnt mean much to anybody unless you care as much about the song as i do which i dont think most do. people like it but its not on the same level as me. not to hate. i just dont think people relisten to this album a lot let alone the amount i do. i dont think people are getting any epiphanies on their first listen or whatever. i dont know. i got lost somewhere in there.

anyway, life felt nice for a couple of days. i had a much more positive outlook, like, if this military veteran could keep on living after all his injustices, then surely i could. surely there was a purpose to this life. --ive always said that i would kill myself when i finished my music, but i know its not true. regardless, ive had "finishing my music" as my life goal , even if i dont really know what that means. its kinda scary, but i dont think im one to finish what i start, so if anything i kind of saved myself there . i wish it was all easier to understand-- and call me maybe kind of went and opened those pearly gates of knowledge to my brain, like the hoary wraths of ice or whatever job is about. gates of orion. i think thats what it was. "out of whose womb did you come from?" . i think i mixed all three of those parts up, i dont know. ((im talking about job from the bible . its like 28th chapter or something i dont remember right now just look up Bible job orion and it should pop up ((((I Just did that and its job 38:31)))))))

eventually, the fling i had with this person and a negative experience (<- looking at kiwifarms for a total of 5minutes (im serious)) kinda crippled me emotionally for the next few days. im not sure why i got so sad after that, but i did. it felt like nothing could really save me. and still, i listened to this stupid little album. i let it cling and wrap itself around my soul like i had room for a penthouse. i am a landlord of myself and the ghostpop tape and i dont charge rent because i hate landlords. whores!

i survived the sadness i guess, but every time it happens i leave lesser than i started. i guess i could say something about outsiders here, i kinda feel like one at times. but that term isnt good probably. i like it. but maybe i just . i dont know. hard to articulate. this album still finds me every time i get lost though. its kind of like some of my friends. they dont have a rope or a way out or anything, but they provide comfort because theyre in the same ditch as i am. ((<- thats actually kind of a lie some of my friends never reassure me on anything i kinda hate that of them . but whatever))

somewhat in that similar train, but this june i felt very sick for whatever unknown reason. i couldnt really move, i felt nauseous, and other nastiness. i told my dad, even though i usually never try to, and he didnt really take it all too well. despite my head feeling way too hot, he thought the smartest thing to do was to make me sleep next to our heater, and i tried to fight him back on it but he just kinda screamed and got mad at me. not great. that night i watched some friends play a game i dont remember and cried. im not really one to cry, so i stopped watching to see if that would change anything. i think the crying came from my dad screaming but maybe also the thought of seeing people happy to be in each other's presence or whatever. i dont know. just feeling like an outsider at times. ((i guess something could be said about subterranean homesick alien or whatever, that song is nice. i also wish the aliens would take me from my bed and show me new worlds)) i put on call me maybe to see if it would change anything (since this was after the song clicked for me) but i ended up just crying significantly more. it was pretty miserable.

the next morning i woke up fine, wasnt feeling sick, although my ear was plugged and stayed that way for a few weeks.

some more things;
sometime in the later end of july: another one of those days... i find myself listening to Call Me Maybe again. someone i blocked some two years ago tried to get back into my life today, they messaged a friend of mine and showed them screenshots for whatever reason. nothing seems to have come out of it, and i think they went away now, but idk. just made me a bit sad. i woke up today at nearly 8pm , and only some maybe 20 minutes after that this all happened. it was just a lot, yknow? you ... the non-existant reader of it all... what do you think?

anyway i got a bit lost there, point is that now i feel a bit more separated from my friendss or something. yknow? weird to me to think that , these people ... really care !! yknow ??????????? yknow,,, yknow.... haha :>

sometime in august: ^ yeah that was the beginning of another dissociative episode. bummer. things quickly got worse after that, and theyre... fine...? for now? which is better than nothing. i do currently find myself in something worse though. i think i must have some inability to process love now..? i definitely used to be able to do this. i remember loving my mom, i remember loving some of the first people i dated.. but as it stands, i find myself in a relationship (bummer, i know) and im incapable of loving her. what? huh? i find myself in admittedly a lot of struggle over this.

as it stands i think i have some drinking problems (no shit) but i didnt realize how much it got to me? ive started struggling with my memory and recalling shit for a while now, about idk how many months, but now its also extended to emotions which isnt very cool. i used to believe i was aromantic in some form because im a piece of shit but as it stands im in a relationship and i cant process that im in love with that person. its not entering my mind. so maybe i really am. maybe i wasnt cut out for this.

im currently listening to sakura, thinking of the impending day where i cut this thing off (because i have to, right? is this gonna change? i dont think im going to be able to process this ever) and its just scary. i dont think im cut out for loving ... which is funny i guess

another thing about this album
theres this person on youtube that uploaded the album in full somewhere in 2018 or 2019, on a channel that they had only used previously for club penguin videos. i never really paid attention because im a soulseek slut but i read the description the other day and it described that he uploaded the album to youtube because his friend, who he originally ran the club penguin channel with, had died, and that this album really helped him cope with the death, and that it felt like he wasnt alone when he listened. i feel much the same.

sometimes when im really focusing on the music, i can kinda see visions of it. the project files, the sequencers, i dont think ive ever used any of the sounds in this album, but i can imagine plugins and their settings, and how the knobs were tweaked for it. its weird. anyway, i also see two visions of his apartment when making this album (theyre both dimly lit) , 1) i see like. dark and green and purple shit. you ever take a photo in a dark room on a camera with its exposure rate set to like 0.2s or something? thats pretty much what i see. 2) this is the more prominent one, i see the dude's "apartment" (house, first floor, but it felt more convenient to call it an apartment) door open, for anybody to enter, and his laptop plugged to some speakers, a midi keyboard, some more bullshit idk. he has reason 6 open on the laptop, the same reason ive been trying to get working for the better part of 6 months, and hes working on bubblegum crisis. i really like that song. the bass on it sounds very clean (but only if you listen on speakers). when i was home alone i used to listen to it a lot. it was nice. i heard this album a lot when i was home alone.

one day ill write about me leaving my house and all its evil in a car playing this. maybe. maybe i wont be listening to anything when i do that. maybe ill never leave. but im repeating myself

conclusion 2
this is pop music for ghosts and all the people with hollow bits of their soul and personality somewhere out there. but thats a bit pretentious. this is moreso music by someone deeply affected by a sad life. i wish better for him. this album helped me too, but i think the only real cure for any of this is to make it. if you want to kill yourself, maybe make an album instead. if it sucks it sucks, and if it doesnt, then maybe someone in a decade will find your avant-garde noise album on bandcamp.

conclusion 3
i got carried out of hand with that last one

all the dead and missing people in my life talk to me through this album and what would i be if i didnt let them talk to me. my living friend tells me to ignore what i think after 9pm but im usually not awake before then and ignoring everything is kinda hard sometimes. i wish if i threw my thoughts out into a pendrive in a bottle and to the sea, that someone would find them and care. but theres not really anything worth caring for in all i say, so its okay. as much as i wish things i said had lasting impacts on people, i have to let things go. i have to let this review end eventually at some point, even though its kinda nothing as it stands.

conclusion 1 (the better one of the three)
i had more thoughts, but i forgot them along the way. this album is nice. its helped me deal with dead people and people that would rather be dead than talk to me. its helped me reason it all in such a weird universe. the internet too. i miss my mom, i kinda miss the fling, i miss some friends i stopped talking to, i miss people i know (and didnt know) that died. whatever. theres ghosts haunting this album and thats why its called ghost pop. maybe one day ill be one of those but this wasnt written for me to wish that.

conclusion 4
ill probably kill myself before finding some solace or comfort or way of snapping out of this. i think of dead people too much and theyve all taken up my life

december: im better now. im still sad, im still not myself, im still not whatever i want to be... but im doing better. and i have hope some day i will find solace. i know this, i trust this. maybe not today, or tomorrow, or next year. but itll all be good before i die. 

[June 28th, 2026:

50 weeks and change after I wrote this and I have somehow managed to observe all up and all below the emotions I was feeling when I first wrote this review. I feel so weird about writing in general and as much as I find comfort in obfuscation I don't think I'll ever write anything like this again. And that's okay. I think it's okay to let go.

When asked to select which account I should unban, a part of me thought I should have picked elephas for an unban instead. I didn't pick elephas. I think I'll spend the rest of my life going over this (or however long it takes for RYM staff to have a change of heart and start handing out unbans for money or whatever) and whether I did the right thing or not, and I don't think I'll ever arrive at a definitive conclusion. In the end, is this really important writing? What's lost with elephas gone? Personally, I have an avenue and audience gone, but that writing isn't gone! I never wrote something which I thought could save a life, or change it, or whatever else, so I don't think in the macrocosm of un-re-reality I actually changed much, but within whatever few specks of sand I can control I think that account meant a little something.

And it's gone!

So it goes.]